Original Article Link
http://www.hindustantimes.com/lifestyle/sexandrelationships/a-calmer-you-mujhe-meri-girlfriend-se-bachao/article1-1210033.aspx
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Hi Sonal,
Greetings!!!
I am very impressed by your article "Mujhe Meri GF se bachao" in today's HT City and trust me you
have hit the nail with it. Infact, I am impressed to an extent that I decided
to take out time from my busy schedule and give you a genuine feedback of your
writing.
Although, after reading your article I am sure you must be
thinking right now that, "Oh really
you are talking as if you are doing a favour to me by writing a feedback and
troubling my inbox, as if I really care" but I would still go ahead
and give you a genuine review.
Firstly, I feel happy about the fact that after this guy Rishabh
jammed your inbox several times, you actually acknowledged him (when ignoring
was an option) and thought about him. Somewhere down the line you also felt bad
for him and made serious and very genuine efforts to simplify his life by
writing this article but trust me, I just hope that his gf and her friends are
not readers of HT City otherwise his situation would only become worse after
this article of yours. You could have respected his call of hiding his identity
and by the way the one extra letter that you have added in his name would only
work if his gf is extremely extremely dumb and trust me girls are not that
dumb! Infact, they intentionally try to be dumb sometimes just to appear cuter
and that is perfectly fine in this manipulative world but this should tell you
that they are smart and not dumb. So I just keep my fingers crossed for poor
Rishabh now.
Now we will come to you article and after reading it thoroughly, I
have realised that you have a very good understanding of life and believe me if
guys would follow all the five points which you have mentioned in your article
then their life would become very simple. Infact, if someone really really
follows all the five points then he might even end up becoming the Prime
Minister of this country one day. I hope you understand what I mean!
So in short, it is an honest attempt from your end to help out
guys but you have only told them a way to simplify and better their lives.
However, your article has only analysed life and not a relationship. So we will
go through all your points one by one-
1.) STOP APOLOGISING: Guys should stop apologising to their
girl for no reason. I completely agree with your point but the problem is that
in a relationship, sometimes a partner likes apologising to the other. It is
their own complex way of expressing their love and care for the other. It could
be the guy or the girl. They kind of enjoy it and keep doing it and this makes
their relationship strong. You may find no sense in it and neither do I, but
those in love would understand what I mean.
Let me move to your second point and make it a little more clear
to you.
2.) DON'T INDULGE TANTRUMS: Trust me and guys please raise
your hands on this, guys like carrying the tantrums of their girls to an extent
you can't even imagine. This "I am not talking to you”; thing has not only
happened to your friends, it actually happens with a lot of guys and girls who
are dating each other. They enjoy it. I will give you an example: Suppose, a BF
calls her GF fat in a notorious way with a cunning smile on his face, then she
really knows it and knows that he is just skillfully cuddling her and that he
did not mean it and she is not that idiot to pick up a fight with him on that
but she still would say "Oh really, then I am not talking to you, bye
bye" and then he will pamper her in
every way possible and it will make no meaning for you but it would mean a lot
for those in a relationship. That is their own complex way of expressing love
and care again.
So I would sum up your first two points like this:
Although
apologising and pampering a girl is wrong and I completely agree with you on
that but guys do enjoy this and it makes their relationships strong and
affectionate. It is very simple having alcohol and smoking is wrong but people
still do it because they enjoy it so that part can't be helped. A small quote
is coming to my mind here and I will say it for you. "The Biggest
addiction for a human being is another human being"
Point number three
3.) Understand the Gender Bender
Nothing in this world could have made more sense than this point
of yours. You said, all girls are pretty messed up in the head most of the
times and I completely agree with you on this. Infact, most of the guys know
this and even the girls know this too but please understand that with the kind
of feminine wave which is going on in the country right now, you are extremely
free to think like this but you really can't say it or write it in a newspaper.
I just hope that you don't have to apologize for these remarks and don't get
into any trouble for this because I understand that your intentions and points
were not wrong and you were only trying to specify some natural inherent traits
of girls but I am very happy that you also added these emotional swings and
messy in the head things are actually the traits which make them so endearing
and lovable to their partners and therefore in this point you have not only
understood life but have also understood love and relationships so full marks
to you for that.
Note* I have nothing against the feminine wave which is on the
rise in our nation right now. Girls feel disgusted, frustrated and suppressed
by the kind of incidents that take place in our country and it is a natural
phenomenon who is suppressed shall rise one day. I feel disgusted by the fact
that girls in our country are ill treated and I want this to end as much as any
daughter of India would want it to end.
Point number four
4.) TALK IT OUT: A very good point you have made, whether it is
life or relationships being quiet is not a solution. Communication gaps always
hurt a relationship, so avoid them it is much better to talk it out and then to
love or leave gracefully instead of sticking with uncertainty in your life.
Talking it out might get good results for some and bad for others but yes it is
the only solution. Full marks to you again on this point.
Last Point
5.) Love or Leave: I so much wish that people who are in a relationship
would understand and follow this in their life but they don't and that is what
gives birth to some extraordinary love stories. Like Hitler marrying his gf in
the last few hours of his life. If she would have left him far before so there
would be no love saga as such. There are many other examples in which couples
actually can't follows this love or leave story and they are all around us. You
know them and I know them too so anybody who wants to make his life simple
would follow this suggestion of Love or Leave but those who are in love would
not even understand it.
So it is all said and done now. I might share this on my FB
profile also as an open letter to you based on the fact that how much time I
actually have right now. The only question which is popping in your head right
now is that "Is this damn guy single or in a relationship?" Well, I
am a single guy that is why I could write this letter to you otherwise I would
have been sipping coffee with my gf somewhere right now. (Although, I don't
like coffee but it hardly matters if my gf would like it).
A little about me:
My name is Rahul Kapoor. A 23 year old guy. I work for an NGO
called 'Amitasha' which gives free education to underprivileged children till
class 12th. It is a very satisfying work. Please feel free to contact me and
contribute to my NGO in any form if you like. I am also author of a romantic
fiction novel called 'Scientist Sister Sleeping Brother'. You can buy it from
any online bookstore or a bookstore near you.
You can reply if you feel like although I won't expect one and yes
I do write a lot myself and I know that no matter how the feedback is whether
positive or negative it is always welcomed by a writer. This is the most
interesting and genuine feedback you will ever get in your life.
Take Care !!!
Regards
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